Social-Emotional Learning (SEL) for Everyone!

“One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Green Corn Moon   SEL:   #1 Self-Awareness          #5 Responsible Decision-Making Digital Learner:  #3 Digital Center Sometimes, I do not want to do what I have to build my business. I become like an oppositional defiant (O.D.D.) child. I tell myself what I often tell my students, “You don’t have to like it, you just have to do it.” My feelings of “Yuk!”   leave me with some observations: “Who got me into this in the first place? Me.” “Whose fault is it? Theirs!” “What are you going to do about it? Nothing!” I grab my camera, breathe, and walk outside. I breathe and take zoom shots of the flowers, trees, birds, and sky. I wear my camera around my neck for two hours to capture the gold and red sunset amid dark thunder clouds. I post the beauties of Montana, USA on Instagram. I find when I honor my “inner child,” the world looks brighter, adult ta...

" One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Green Corn Moon   SEL:   #2 Social Awareness          #4 Relationship Skills Digital Learner:  #4 Creative Communicator   My friend says, “It’s not what happens to us. What’s important is, did we show up with our integrity?” In other words, did I offer that complicated person a chance to grow? I can stand, without expectation, in my truth. The other person’s opinions or actions are none of my business, especially during the atrocious aftermath of a betrayal. My job is to stand in my own integrity.   To the betrayer, I make this kind of sincere apology, “I’m sorry if my actions caused you any pain.” My subtext is, “Nevertheless, I’m going to do it again to keep these boundaries firm.” My voice is authentic. It can be heard quietly and it does not have be loud to be effective. Aloha love, Carla   I am committed to being an effective member of the global d...

“One day . . . or day one.” Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Planting Moon   SEL:   #3 Self-Management          #5 Responsible Decision Making Digital Learner: #5 Knowledge Constructor       #7 Innovative Designer I’d heard of PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) for a long time. What was new for me was PTG: post-traumatic growth ( Tedeschi and Calhoun, 1996 ). Regardless of the calamity, when the fire, tornado, hurricane or flood is over; when the accident, illness, bankruptcy or betrayal causing emotional devastation is done, another condition emerges. We find ourselves perplexed, exhausted, and still here, while facing an ugly reality we never dreamed possible. My friend in a wheelchair said, “You’re in post-traumatic growth.” “I’ve never heard of it.” “Oh, yes. You rebuild with whatever you have left. Just start a new life.” Oh, snap! OK. Just start a new life, she says. Many months later...

" One day . . . or day one.”  -- Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Planting Moon SEL:  #1 Self-Awareness           #2 Social Awareness           #3 Self-Management Digital Learner:  #2 Global Collaborator I recently did a curious thing: I bought a new spiral notebook for the gratitude journals I’ve kept for years and didn’t write anything in it for months. I felt like I was living in the land-of-Odd-and-Strange. A habit I had nurtured for decades disappeared. I mentally acknowledged gratitude, but it didn’t have the same effect as writing it down where I could reflect on it later. I like to write things down and let them incubate. I do that with new skills, fitness, etc. We all have a “shadow” side. Instead of berating myself and starting those self-inflicted “whispers of diminishment,” with awareness, I recognized that my behavior had changed. I had a choice: go back to ...

"One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Flower Moon   SEL:  #2 Social Awareness           #4 Relationship Skills           #5 Responsible Decision-Making   Digital Learner:   #5 Knowledge Constructor                               #6 Computational Thinker One sunny winter’s day, I heard the little girls next door sobbing. Not in anger, not screeching cries in play, but sobbing in deep distress. These were little two-and three-year-olds! I grabbed my baseball bat and went flying out the front door in boots, and skidded to a halt. Two moms and a dad were patting the snowman’s head back on as fast as gloved hands could work. The snowman’s long carrot nose was broken, his charcoal eyes had fallen out. T...

  "One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous   Cherokee Month of the Windy Moon   SEL:   #1 Self-Awareness           #4 Relationship Skills Digital Learner:   #4 Creative Communicator   A friend of mine asked me if I was listening to the “whispers of diminishment” inside my head. I was discouraged, disappointed, deeply upset, agitated, and distraught. Yes. This was “energy-confetti” because it caused me to pause building my business -- in a negative way. If I pause to reflect and re-plan, fine. If I am numb and quit working, that is something else. Also, being funny doesn’t happen for me when I am low-minded. And, a critical part of my work is humor. Now what? Some people in my life were part of the “whispers of diminishment” campaign: “You’ll never write anything.” “People don’t make a living by writing.” This is hilarious to me in hindsight. This person subscribed to magazines, bought books, and rea...

"One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Windy Moon   SEL:  #1 Self-Awareness           #5 Responsible Decision-Making Digital Learner:  #1 Empowered Learner Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “We fancy men are individuals; so are pumpkins; but every pumpkin in the field goes through every point of pumpkin history.” We cannot live vicariously through someone else’s learning, recovery, training, etc. Each of us is responsible for the thoroughness of our own lives. I was quite careless with time in my twenties. Now, many decades later, I wish I had some of it back. I chose to build a new business three years ago, when my husband died. I took start-up business classes from my local small business development center. Guess what? I was nowhere near the effective time-manager I thought I was. I began to log my time and mentally put my life through a big funnel. Drip. Drip. Drip. I reconfigured my work plan. I decided who would h...