Social-Emotional Learning (SEL) for Everyone!

"One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Flower Moon   SEL:  #2 Social Awareness           #4 Relationship Skills           #5 Responsible Decision-Making   Digital Learner:   #5 Knowledge Constructor                               #6 Computational Thinker One sunny winter’s day, I heard the little girls next door sobbing. Not in anger, not screeching cries in play, but sobbing in deep distress. These were little two-and three-year-olds! I grabbed my baseball bat and went flying out the front door in boots, and skidded to a halt. Two moms and a dad were patting the snowman’s head back on as fast as gloved hands could work. The snowman’s long carrot nose was broken, his charcoal eyes had fallen out. T...

  "One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous   Cherokee Month of the Windy Moon   SEL:   #1 Self-Awareness           #4 Relationship Skills Digital Learner:   #4 Creative Communicator   A friend of mine asked me if I was listening to the “whispers of diminishment” inside my head. I was discouraged, disappointed, deeply upset, agitated, and distraught. Yes. This was “energy-confetti” because it caused me to pause building my business -- in a negative way. If I pause to reflect and re-plan, fine. If I am numb and quit working, that is something else. Also, being funny doesn’t happen for me when I am low-minded. And, a critical part of my work is humor. Now what? Some people in my life were part of the “whispers of diminishment” campaign: “You’ll never write anything.” “People don’t make a living by writing.” This is hilarious to me in hindsight. This person subscribed to magazines, bought books, and rea...

"One day . . . or day one.” -- Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Windy Moon   SEL:  #1 Self-Awareness           #5 Responsible Decision-Making Digital Learner:  #1 Empowered Learner Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “We fancy men are individuals; so are pumpkins; but every pumpkin in the field goes through every point of pumpkin history.” We cannot live vicariously through someone else’s learning, recovery, training, etc. Each of us is responsible for the thoroughness of our own lives. I was quite careless with time in my twenties. Now, many decades later, I wish I had some of it back. I chose to build a new business three years ago, when my husband died. I took start-up business classes from my local small business development center. Guess what? I was nowhere near the effective time-manager I thought I was. I began to log my time and mentally put my life through a big funnel. Drip. Drip. Drip. I reconfigured my work plan. I decided who would h...

  “One day . . . or day one.” Anonymous   Cherokee month of the Windy Moon. SEL:   #3 Self-Management              #5 Responsible Decision Making Digital Learner:  #5 Knowledge Constructor                               #6 Computational Thinker My husband taught me a technique and I have found it profoundly valuable in social, family, and business settings. Working on a team can be complicated, even if it is a team of two in a marriage. We had an intense discussion for about seven minutes until one of us asked, “Hey, is this a blow-it-off?”   As a drummer, for my husband, a blow-it-off could have been about driving in bad weather, other musicians in the band, the truck, the gear, the trailer, the venue, or the attendees at the venue. For me, school and my students can be festive, but a drive to school in poor weather, bad d...

  “One day . . . or day one.” Anonymous   Cherokee Month of the Bone Moon   SEL:   #3 Self-Management               # 4 Relationship Skills   Digital Learner:    #1 Empowered Learner   People are busy and often stressed with pressures from housing, working at home, their career/business, and family issues. I am not an effective communicator if I expect people to read my mind or to meet my needs. I ask for what I want and need. I often say to my students and friends, “I trust you to do what is right for you and then to re-choose it, if necessary. I know you will ask for what you need.” I can then evaluate whether I am able to meet their needs, and if not, I will certainly brainstorm the 10 elegant solutions for every problem with them .   Aloha love, Carla   I am committed to being an effective member of the global digital community by writing children’s picture ...

 " One day . . . or day one.” Anonymous Cherokee Month of the Cold Moon (du no lv ta ni)   SEL:   #3 Self-Management    SEL:   #4 Relationship Skills    Digital Learner:     #4 Creative Communicator Triangulation can poison relationships. When Person A goes to Person B and asks him or her to tell Person C something, this is not direct communication. Being direct, with compassion, takes practice to learn because we rarely hear about it. Person C can put a stop to this by going straight to Person A. Person B has no business in the middle of A and C’s business anyway. If Person C is complicated, the easiest way to resolve issues is to put everyone in the same room. A few ground rules: No sentence can begin with the word “You . . ,” since that constitutes an attack. Limit each person to three or four sentences at a time. (I was upset one time, rambled on, and my husband said, “That was 23 sentences. You must be highly stressed...

“One day . . . or day one.” Anonymous   Cherokee Month of the Cold Moon (v s gi ga)   SEL:   #3 Self-Management             #4 Relationship Skills                               Digital Learner:    #2 Global Collaborator   “Did I hear you say . . .?” “No. I said . . . “ “OK. Now I heard . . .” “Not quite, but close . . .”   “I need more information.” “Sure . . .Now, what did you hear me say?” “. . . That’s it?” “Yeppers!” “Woo-Hoo! Finally!”   The technique of mirroring back my understanding of a conversation can help to resolve conflict before it starts and to avoid wasted time on business teams. My perspective may not be correct even though we are speaking the same language. I learned from a tech this summer that, as a computer science major...